Aesthetic Expressions

Course: English 222 Introduction to Poetry (Fall 2019)

I decided to take Introduction to Poetry in the Fall semester of 2019. I have always loved writing poetry but lacked confidence when it came to sharing my work with other people. When starting this course, I was terrified and anxious to read my writing to others to be criticized. The first poem I shared was not received well, and though it seemed negative at the time, it motivated me to improve my writing and listen to the advice that was offered to me. As time when on, I began to feel more comfortable in sharing my work and I started to make poetry I was extremely proud of and confident in.

The workshop environment, though intimidating at first, grew into a group of people I could trust and felt comfortable with. I grew to see constructive criticism from others as a positive thing and began to open up and find it easier to offer comments to others on their work. I loved being able to hear work shared every week and to see others grow in their writing skills as well. There were so many different voices and experiences shared. With a workshop class, I think you feel much closer to your classmates because you are sharing a kind of writing that is often very personal. Before taking the course, I was terrified of anyone offering criticism on my poetry, but I realize now that was something keeping me from improving my skills.
This writing workshop course allowed me to become a better writer, learn to accept and improve from constructive criticism, and helped me gain more confidence in my work.

One of the poems I am most proud that I created during the course is titled “Please Don’t See Through My Smile”, which I have decided to share. The class was given a prompt to write a poem based on or inspired by a piece of artwork. I chose a piece that is on display in the Longwood Center for the Visual Arts titled “The Artist as Elizabeth Vigee Le Brun” by Kathy Calhoun.

please don’t see through my smile (response to “The Artist as Elizabeth Vigee Le Brun” by Kathy Calhoun)

hair painted gold and red
unrealistic, framed and on display
i’m uncomfortable.
my toothy smile upturned
bright white
like I am begging to be seen.
look at my work,
do not look at me.

i am all
blue gray oil paint
under fingernails,
sweat and elbow grease.
you hang my tears and sorrow
in your living room.

you want to carry my legacy?
it is not under these eye bags,
messy hair you paint all red, gold, and royal blue.
it’s what I create.
stop painting me.

i want to disappear in acrylic pigment
until my bones cannot be dug up under it all.
bury my body in this colored symphony
created to cope,
to drown
in the only place
i really look like me.

please,
don’t see through my smile.
this brokenness only sells on canvas.