He’ll Call…Maybe He’s Out of Town

He’s just not that into you; something a person never wants to hear when they have feelings for that certain person. Your friend says “But he said he’ll call”, they say, “We’ve emailed each other a couple times…” All of these “reasons” of why he is apparently still into your friend are just them hoping, and holding on to this guy that obviously doesn’t care enough to call. So why is your friend longing for this guy to call? Is it because she legitimately liked him, or is it because they just want that romantic relationship that is in all movies, music,

Image by flickr user epSos.de/ CC licensed

advertisements, and our general surroundings today? In the movie, based off of a book, He’s Just Not That Into You, various characters go through their experiences with love and heart break.

What’s it to ya?

Everyday people are getting back together, and breaking up. We see it all around us; it’s in the news, with our friends, family, and our surrounding peers. Relationships evolve; for example a friendship can prosper into a romantic relationship. To counteract that, the “love of your life” may turn out to be a lesson learned; but don’t fret, with your shared that intimacy, and closeness, that he may be a perfect candidate for a new best friend.

“He’s just not into you….”

Just hearing the phrase, as I said earlier, can be devastating. When a person hears this phrase this means their partner was A-never interested or B-eventually lost interest. But what exactly does the phrase mean? Whether a person’s significant other was never interested, or if they actually were at one point, it doesn’t matter; the feelings that are necessary for a romantic relationship to blossom aren’t there. In the movie He’s Just Not That Into You, the main character Gigi struggles with this concept. Gigi is a hopeless romantic who starts imagining their wedding the minute a guy asks for her number. Gigi makes a close friend during the movie, Alex, and they share a close, open bond. Alex is the only male friend that is seen of Gigi’s throughout the movie. However, according to a study performed on cross-sex friendships, male friends are more helpful to have. (Cheung & McBride-Chang, 2010) Throughout the movie we hear Alex say….

“Gigi, he’s just not that into you…”

So what does this mean? One huge part of him not wanting to further his relationship with you is his lack of commitment. Commitment is known as when a person makes a decision to be with their significant, and remain in it with the future in mind. (Wood, 2010) With the statement “he’s just not that into you”, it shows that there is no commitment, nor will there be any time soon, on the significant other’s side. “…we always try to justify why our crushes act like they don’t have mutual feelings…” explains in her post. And she’s right. Why the constant work and effort in a relationship that isn’t giving anything back. With the lack of commitment blatantly obvious, why do people have the need to continue trying?

You should call him…

In the beginning of the movie, Gigi is on a blind date with a man named Connor. After the date, they say their goodbyes, and Gigi is smitten with him; however, Connor doesn’t feel the same way about Gigi. And so, Gigi waits for Connor to call and the longer she waits, the more anxious she gets about him not calling

Image by flickr user Moyan_Brenn/ CC licensed

her back. Finally in the office one day, a co-worker suggests that “times are changing” and women are “allowed” to call men. This inspires Gigi, and so she decides to get together with a co-worker and write a script to use when talking to Connor because she is extremely nervous and new to calling the guy first.

A reason that Gigi is scared to call Connor first is the idea of vulnerability. Vulnerability, when thinking of communicating emotions, is being timid to share our feelings with others because people are afraid how their significant other will react and perceive them after revealing their emotions. Upon calling Connor, Gigi is sent to his voicemail. She starts to read over her outline to the message machine, when she loses her place on her script. She then starts to ramble about how great of a time she had and eventually hangs up the phone. This leaves Gigi in a more vulnerable place, because when she finally decided to share her emotions, she messed up and rambled.

Want to be friends?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sCWvVSE0WMk

Towards the beginning on the movie, we see Gigi and Alex meet. The soon become good close friends. Through the movie Gigi constantly calling Alex for boy and dating advice. Gigi goes to Alex for this advice because she knows that he will be open and honest with her about what she is doing.

Alex is exemplifying an openness relational dialectic. A relational dialectic is a natural occurrence in a relationship (romantic or friendship) such as tensions and opposite forces, and how the people involved deal with them. (Wood, 2010) The dialectic that relates to this particular situation is the idea of openness and closedness.

In Gigi’s communication to Alex in their friendship, there isn’t a lot of information that isn’t shared, and this is considered openness. (Wood, 2010) An example of this is when Gigi is at a date’s apartment after the date and she isn’t sure what to do. She runs to the bathroom and calls Alex asking for his advice. She gives a detailed description of what was happening throughout the night and just moments ago; she even goes into a bit of sexual information.

If Gigi hadn’t had given Alex all the details of the night, this would be considered closedness, because she is still keeping a level of privacy in their communication. (Wood, 2010) However, Gigi did not use any privacy in their conversation and so she is utilizing an openness relational dialectic.

Aren’t you listening?

Alex is constantly helping out Gigi in He’s Just Not That Into You. Gigi is regularly calling Alex at all parts of the day to ask for his advice about whatever situation she is in, or about to enter into. Throughout their conversations on the phone, Gigi will always be in the same situation in the end-the guy isn’t into her; however, she always ends up calling Alex, and giving him a new situation.

Gigi is participating in a type of listening know as monopolizing. Monopolizing is a term used to describe a participant in a conversation who is constantly looking for a way to turn a conversation they are to focus on themselves and what’s going on in their lives. Gigi and Alex’s only conversations they have are about the men that Gigi are interested in. In one conversation, Gigi excuses a guy for not calling by saying “he may have lost my number…” and Alex responds by saying “I once called 55 Laura Bells before contacting the right one.” Gigi pauses for a moment, and then proceeds to ask what to do now. Even if Alex is talking about a past experience he has had in the dating world, Gigi still finds a way to take the story and evolve it to fit into what she wants to talk about. Finally, because Gigi never listens to what advice Alex is actually giving, she finds herself in a revolving door of bad guys who don’t want a relationship like she does.

Gigi doesn’t practice good listening because in order to do so, one has to “actually pay attention to concentrate on what other people are saying“. As previously stated, she simply likes to just turn everything Alex is saying into how her situations are different; however, if she were to actually listen, she would realize that he has situations very similar to what she is going through at that moment.

“You’re my exception”

At the end of the movie, we see a shift in Gigi and Alex’s relationship. Throughout the entire movie, we have watched them be good friends. Gigi calls Alex for advice, and Alex gives his opinion to Gigi straight up, no shenanigans. About a quarter of the way through, Gigi expresses her feelings towards Alex, however, he doesn’t reciprocate. After some time apart, Alex realizes that he does have feelings for Gigi. Alex confronts Gigi at her apartment about how he feels and this is when their relationship shifts.

In a committed romantic relationship, there is a mutual understanding of belonging in each other’s lives and putting them above other things. (Wood, 2010) There are three pieces that put together a committed romantic relationship and they are commitment, intimacy, and passion.

In Gigi and Alex’s friendship they held two of the three pieces to be in a committed romantic relationship. Gigi and Alex had commitment before in their friendship by remaining involved and giving their relationship attention. They were there for each other and helped each other a lot. Secondly, they had an intimate relationship because they knew a lot about each other. They shared the connection and closedness that was just between the two of them.

During the conversation that shifted Gigi and Alex’s friendship to a romantic relationship, Alex kisses Gigi. This is the last piece of the committed romantic relationship that they needed: passion. Passion is the desire for one another, the spark that is needed for a relationship. (Woods, 2010) By confronting Gigi about how he felt about her, and sealing it with a kiss, Alex showed that he had passion for Gigi. However, passion isn’t just about the kissing and sexual attention towards one another. It also “provides the driving force for romance, fun and adventure…” We see this side of passion at the end of the movie. Alex has friends over for a game night and we see him and Gigi playing and still having fun, but now as a couple not just as friends.

In conclusion, through watching the movie, He’s Just Not That Into You, we watch many relationships go through many different stages and subjects of relationships; however, Gigi and Alex’s relationship is the most evolving one all through the story line. They move from acquaintances, to fast friends, to eventually romantic partners.

One thing we learn from this movie is that there are many signs to whether a relationship is working or not. With that said, ladies and gentlemen, please do not be afraid to tell a friend in need that “he’s just not that into you”.

References:

Cheung, S., & McBride-Chang, C. (2011). Relations of Gender, Gender-Related Personality Characteristics, and Dating Status to Adolescents’ Cross-Sex Friendship Quality. Sex Roles, 64(1/2), 59-69.

Taft, M. (2011, July 30). Learning to listen. Huffington post, Retrieved from http://www.huffingtonpost.com/michael-taft/learning-to-listen_b_912046.html

Torre, A. J. (2012, November 1). Really, he’s just not that into you. Huffington post. Retrieved from http://www.huffingtonpost.com/alexis-jane-torre/really-hes-just-not-that-_b_2056476.html

Wood, J. T. (2010). Interpersonal communication: everyday encounters (6th ed.).

Yoba, A. (2012, May 28). A lesson in affection: Bringing passion to relationship. The huffington post, Retrieved from http://www.huffingtonpost.com/akoshia-yoba/a-lesson-in-affection-bri_b_1550423.html

Video retrieved from: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sCWvVSE0WMk

Images Retrieved from:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/aigle_dore/4089511514/sizes/m/in/photostream/

http://www.flickr.com/photos/epsos/6180907719/

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Are Apple Products Worth It?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LADAq8b2cyk&feature=related

It’s interesting how information reaches people. A lot of the time, we see that something significant isn’t brought to light unless something big happens. An example of this was in China in 2010. Foxconn, the company that puts together a lot of Apple products, had 18 attempted suicides with fourteen actual deaths. These deaths happened because employees were protesting the horrible working conditions the Foxconn employees had to deal with including poor housing, heavy workloads, and unsafe working environments.

Now let’s compare this to America: we have organizations such as labor unions that help protect workers here in the US from situations like what the Foxconn employees had to go through. If a company was caught treating their employees like Foxconn was in the US, it would be shut down immediately.

Another problem with this situation is that the only reason people knew about these conditions is because people had to either actually commit suicide or threatens to. That’s the only reason attention was drawn to the working conditions. If these employees hadn’t have protested these working conditions (and in such a drastic way), no one outside the company may know about the them. Thankfully, because so much attnetion has been drawn to the company after the protesting, Foxconn has slowly worked on their conditions within the company.

My question is why is it that the employees had to be so drastic in their protest to get attention? Why was it so difficult for the employees to get attention on this? And why hadn’t the word spread about the conditions without employees having to threaten to commit suicide? And finally, did Apple sales go down after an event like this surfaced world wide?

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“Come Fly With Me…”

Recently I took a trip down to Alabama, and this trip included flying. I personally love to people watch, and knowing that there was a layover in Detroit for an hour there, and a two hour layover in Atlanta, I was automatically excited.
Detroit

Image from: http://www.flickr.com/photos/wildhaber/5976264120/sizes/m/in/photostream/

Across from us was a couple that had made a make-shift bed out of the waiting seats and were fast asleep. About twenty minutes before it was time to load, our gate became crowded with all our fellow travelers. Because there were so many people, seats became scarce. The couple that was sleeping across from us, were still sleeping and didn’t realize this. They had their carry-ons laid out in front of them, making it an obstacle course for anyone who wanted to get to the vacant seats beside them. Eventually, one lady decided to try to get to these seats. She quietly and slowly tried maneuvering across the luggage. As she moved around them and their luggage, she let out a few sighs, and let out a quiet yelp when she almost fell. When she finally got to her seat, she sat down, looked at the couple, and rolled her eyes because they were still fast asleep.
Atlanta
In in our lay-over in Atlanta, my friend and I had lost track of time and had to run to our gate. When we got there, they had already called out zone to board. We went straight to the front of the line, because everyone else was waiting for their zone to be called. When we were moving around people, they were rolling their eyes, barely moving their bags for us, and letting out long loud sighs. One lady even gave us a dirty look. We weren’t meaning to make people mad; we were just trying to get on when we were supposed to.
Why Does This Matter?
All of these experiences I experienced at the airport are examples of nonverbal communication. Nonverbal communication deals with all communication that isn’t talking (Wood, 2010). Some examples of nonverbal communication are the way people look at certain things, why people wear what they wear, and body language in general. Nonverbal communication is all around us. As the principles of interpersonal communication states, we can’t not communicate; meaning, even when we’re not trying to communicate we are. You can read a lot about the way a person feels about something by their body language. If a friend is confiding in another friend about a problem, however, that friend is looking off in the distance, or texting, you can tell that he or she isn’t paying attention to their friend’s problems.
All of these experiences from my trip fall into certain categories of nonverbal communication.
Whenever someone was sighing or anything of that nature, it is a form of Paralanguage nonverbal communication. Wood explains that paralanguage happens will people say things; however, they’re not real words. Some other examples of paralanguage are how loud someone says something and how they emphasize their speech. Paralanguage helps us know how others are feeling because it helps us see how someone is feeling. By people sighing towards us, my friend and I were able to tell that they were annoyed or angry because we were getting ahead of them in the line. In the example of the woman sighing towards the music player, she was trying to signal him to turn his music down, without have to actually say anything.
Whenever someone would roll their eyes, or give us an evil stare, that is a form of Kinesics body language. In Louisville’s article Kinesics is “one of the most powerful ways that humans can communicate nonverbally.” Through seeing people roll their eyes at us, we were able to tell that they were mad and or annoyed at us; and we especially knew what was wrong when we got evil stares; because of kinesics, those people didn’t have to speak a single word to us, we knew what they were thinking.

Through Kinesics, we can tell these girls are happy to be together because they are smiling and embracing each other.

Nonverbal communication is everywhere. People use it whenever they have interactions, or even if they’re by themselves. Because of nonverbal we are able to read people without having to say a single word to them.
Cited Sources:
University of Louisville. (2007). Kinescis. Retrieved from http://cobweb2.louisville.edu/faculty/regbruce/bruce//mgmtwebs/commun_f98/kinesics.htm
Wood, J. T. (2011). Interpersonal communication, everyday encounters. (6 ed.). Wadsworth Pub Co.
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“Momma Always Said…”

The movie Forrest Gump reached a vast amount of people; according to The New York Time the movie sold over $660 million dollars in movie tickets. So with this said, one could definitely say that a lot of people are familiar with the movie. In the scene above we see Gump telling Jenny about his personal experiences throughout his life; he reminisces about Vietnam and when he ran across the country.

This video clip shows Forrest revealing personal happenings in his life; these are things that he hadn’t revealed to anyone else in his life. This isn’t something that only happens in movie; this happens in everyday life as well. Everyone has those days where they have to get something off their chest when they’re mad or upset about something. We’ve all told someone, “Okay, I’m going to tell you something, but you’ve got to swear you won’t tell anyone…” And that’s okay; it’s part of improving our self esteem and self perception.

What Forrest Gump is exemplifying in the video is known as “self-disclosure”. Self disclosure is when one tells information to someone else that they wouldn’t know about on their own. (Wood, 2010) During this video, Forrest describes how the sky would inspire him, and how beautiful Vietnam was when it didn’t rain; little things like these are something that Forrest didn’t share to many people. They were quiet, peaceful times that meant a lot to him. Forrest trusted and loved Jenny, and when she became sick, he wanted to cheer her up and this was the only way he knew how. By telling Jenny about these times, he also got to look back and reminisce about the rare peaceful times he had during those crazy times in his life. After Forrest finishes telling Jenny his stories, Jenny says, “I wish I had been there with you.” Forrest responds by saying, “But you were.” By Forrest confiding in her, Jenny felt open enough to tell Forrest how she really felt and she was able to do a small example of self-disclosure herself; by doing this self-disclosure she was also able to get a new perspective on her life and how she really did effect Forrest’s life.

Self-disclosure is a healthy way to help your personal growth. By confiding in people, you are able to not only get something off your chest, you are also helping people get to know you better and gain new outlooks on yourself from the feedback you get from others. Although Forrest did use self-disclosure a lot when communicating with Jenny, this is not the only example in this movie; Forrest is self-confiding throughout the entire movie by telling various people pieces of his story. We find Forrest asking himself questions and figuring things out through telling his story. In the end, Forrest learns a lot about himself through self-disclosure.

Resources:

Forrest gump- “life is like a box of chocolate” [Web]. (2011). Retrieved from http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CJh59vZ8ccc

The best scene of forrest gump [Web]. (2011). Retrieved from http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nFvASiMTDz0&feature=related

Weinraub, B. (1995, May 25). ‘Gump’, a huge hit, still isn’t ranking in huge profits? hmm. The New York Times. Retrieved from h ttp://www.nytimes.com/1995/05/25/movies/gump-a-huge-hit-still-isn-t-raking-in-huge-profits-hmm.html?pagewanted=all&src=pm

Wood, J. T. (2010). Interpersonal communication: everyday encounters (6th ed.). Boston, MA: Wadsworth, Cengage Learning

 

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A Little Bit About Me

Hello all! My name is Hillary Bourke and I am currently a senior at Longwood University majoring in Communication Studies with a concentration in Organizational Communication and Public Relations. After it is all said and done and I graduate, I’d like to enter the public relations field. I want to work for a public relations firm; however, any job in this economy would be nice! I was born and raised in the oh-so-famous Orange County Virginia. If you’re thinking to yourself, “where in the world is that?” don’t feel bad it’s not exactly a metropolis but it’s what I call home. I am entering my third year as an active sister of Sigma Kappa here on campus. My sorority has shaped me into the person I am today and I am very thankful for having this experience in my life.

I have many different experiences in the communication field thanks to Longwood University. The first area that helped me gain knowledge is the Communication Studies department. All of my communication classes will help me in the future. I have improved my public speaking, learned how to create press releases, media contact lists, and how to perform media scans; and that’s just a fraction of everything I’ve learned. This summer I worked for the Conferences and Scheduling office as the Quality Control Coordinator. This was a great experience because I was able to work with conference guests constantly, worked on my team work and multi-tasking abilities, and helped me become a better leader. As previously stated, I am an active sister of Sigma Kappa. During my time in my chapter, I have help two positions so far: Continuing Membership Chair and Ritual Chair. As Continuing Membership Chair, I have been gain experience in event planning. I was in charge of informal recruitment which means I planned the open houses to recruit potential new members for our chapter. It was challenging, however very rewarding when everything would come together. My next position, Ritual Chair has been different. I have had to organize ceremonies for 60 plus sisters to attend. Along with, I have to make sure I am following a certain criteria with each ceremony. (It’s similar to using a rubric for a blog or project) This can be challenging, however, it has made me appreciate my organization even more.

 

With all my experiences in class, my internship, and Sigma Kappa, I have been able to improve my communication skills. I can’t wait to enter the public relations field when I graduate because I am fascinated by the communication field.

“Experience is a tough teacher because she gives her test first, then her lessons.”

-Vernon Law

 

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Hey! What About Me?

Ann Hopkins was a well qualified manager at her accounting firm. She had worked at Price Waterhouse’s Office of Government Services for five bringing in more accounts than any of her work associates; she even went as far as to accomplish landing a 25 million dollar contract. Needless to say, she had earned an opportunity to become a partner at her Ann Hopkins during trialfirm; however, after two years of consideration for the positions, she was denied her well deserved position. People with common sense would ask ‘How has she not been given this amazing opportunity?’ Price Waterhouse argued in court that Hopkins was “overly aggressive, unduly harsh, difficult to work with, and impatient with staff”; however, to argue this, her clients explained she was, “an outstanding professional…strong character, [having] independence and integrity, very productive, energetic and creative.” (law.cornell) Although there were opposite opinions about her efforts at the firm, the judge ruled in Hopkins’ favor charging the company with sex discrimination under Title VII of the Civil Rights Act of 1964.

So what’s it to you?

This particular case is just one of many that have caught companies in the act of discriminating against women. Being hired as a women in competitive jobs is hard enough, nevermind actually moving forward in a leadership position. According to Forbes magazine in 2001, “…less than 5% of America’s Top 500 executives are women,”. Women are held to different standards than men in the business world. There are many factors and obstacles that go into being a woman of the business world today. These problems  include having the responsibility of a second shift, being constricted by a glass ceiling, and having to face sexual harrassment at work.

Working Overtime

Women are held to different standards than men are. In our culture many women are raised to believe that it is their job to care for the kids and the house; this makes it difficult because according to the Gendered Lives “the vast majority of heterosexual familites today have two wage earners…on average, each week married mothers spend 51 hours taking care of children…” So with that being said, really married mothers that work a full time job during the week have two full time jobs; According to the same book, “fathers spend 33 hours…” The difference between these two parents is that it is usually assumed in our culture that the mother is going to do what is expected of her and the father is just the “bread winner”. This “second job” that the mother assumes when getting off of work is called the “second shift”. After women started having a job outside of the household, the second shift theory “suggests that women added a shift of paid owrk to a shift of unpaid work and now put in two shifts versus one shift worked by men.” An example of this is in my family. My mother works as a secretary in Charlottesville and with traffic it takes about fourty-five minutes to get home from the office. After getting home around five, she does the following:

  • Drives another forty-five minutes to take my little sister to her riding lesson
  • Watches her ride while helping my little brother with homework
  • Drives back home
  • Feeds the kids
  • Helps my little sister with homework
  • Takes care of the horses
  • Gets the kids ready for bed
  • Does laundry

It is said that if all the time is put together of how much mothers work for their second shift, it averages that “they worked an extra month of twenty-four-hour days a year…”.

Why can’t I break through?

Getting hired in today’s economy is hard enough as it is; however, some people are able to succeed at this and get a job that they enjoy. Usually it is a general goal to eventually advance in your company; however, this isn’t always possible. This can also be called a “glass ceiling”. A glass ceiling “refers to the difficulty of women trying to be promoted into the top management levels.” This term hasn’t been around for long at all. It was brought into light in 1991, and although one would think things would change since light had been brought on the subject that isn’t the case. As of 2005, “women occupied only 16.4% of corporate officer positions. This is only a .7 percent increase since 2002.” We saw the glass ceiling effect in the Price Waterhouse v. Hopkins case. Hopkins was a very well qualified employee that had proven herself many times throughout her time with the company; however, she continuously was declined partnership of the company. It is very apparent that this company didn’t favor women at all. At Price Waterhouse “Of the 662 partners at the firm at the time, 7 were women. Of the 88 persons for partnership that year, only 1 (Hopkins) was a women…” and as we discovered she was not rewarded the job. The glass ceiling effect is very apparent in today’s world, keeping perfectly qualified women from getting the jobs that they deserve.

That’s a little inappropriate…

There are many instances where women have felt unwelcome in their workplace because of the way they have been treated by others. A common reason for their uneasiness is sexual harassment. Sexual harassment is “unwelcome sexual advances, requests for sexual favors, and other verbal or physcial harassment of a sexual nature.” This can be done through many different ways such as texting, emailing, jokes, any other types of messages, or any type of physical touching.  A women that had been working in the market for 7 years explained in a study done in 2009, “sexual harassment is a common thing that we face almost everyday…the general belief is that market women are easy women…” When women face things like this everyday at work not only will it effect them emotionally; however, it will eventually effect their work ethic and their drive to want to even come to work every morninng. Looking back at Ann Hopkins’ case, she too suffered from sexual harassment. During her time at Price Waterhouse, she was asked to fix her hair and wear more jewelry. My question is, why does attire matter? She’s an accountant not a model. The reason that this is considered sexual harassment is because it made her feel uncomfortable. With women being judged like this regularly, it’s hard not to feel uncomfortable and distracted at work. Women have a difficult time in the workplace as it is; with the constant worrying about appearance and unwanted attention from co-workers, it’s hard not to have an even harder time when clocking in.

Is anything really changing?

After going through all the different challenges that women face today it makes a females feel more intimidated; especially for us that will be entering the real world for the first time here soon post college. However, there is hope. There has been some improvements over the years. One example of this change is Students Active for Ending Rape or SAFER. Started in 2000, this organization is the only one of its kind. It’s led by students to help educate campuses on sexual violence and assult. Now how does this tie into the workplace? This is actually key to the workplace. Students in colleges today are the future of the business world. Upon learning everything SAFER teaches them, they can carry that into their future and influence each of their workplaces. SAFER is exactly what we need to have a better future for women. Another reform program women are holding all throughout the world is called “SlutWalks“. This is to fight against the violence and assult women get for “dressing like sluts”. Started after a controvery arose from police officer telling girls “avoid dressing like sluts” in order to provide rape prevention advice. These walks are to help inform people of what rape really is and that you don’t have to be a “slut” to have endured it. This again is connected to the workplace as well because women are constantly judged by how we look. In Hopkins’ case she wasn’t dressing up enough, in other women’s cases they’ll be too dressed up or dressed “like a slut”. This program raises awareness that is literally being spread throughout the world and so this will eventually influence people of the workplace as well.

It is because of reform programs like these listed above, that we can hope for the future female generations. Obstacles such as the second shift, the glass ceiling, and sexual harassment make the workplace even more challenging. The female population is needed in the business world for diversity and hopefully one day this will be completely understood.

 

Work Cited:

Abdel-hameid, S., & AbdelRhman, W. (2009). Sexual Harassment in the Workplace. Ahfad Journal, 26(1), 3-24.

Elacqua, T.
C., Beehr, T. A., Hansen, C. P., & Webster, J. (2009). MANAGERS’ BELIEFS ABOUT THE GLASS CEILING: INTERPERSONAL AND ORGANIZATIONAL FACTORS. Psychology Of Women Quarterly, 33(3), 285-294. doi:10.1111/j.1471-6402.2009.01501.x

Legal Information Institute. (n.d.). Price waterhous v. hopkins. Retrieved
from http://www.law.cornell.edu/supct/html/historics/USSC_CR_0490_0228_ZO.html

Sayer, L. C., England, P., Bittman, M., & Bianchi, S. M. (2009). How Long Is the Second
(Plus First) Shift? Gender Differences in Paid, Unpaid, and Total Work Time in Australia and the United States. Journal Of Comparative Family Studies, 40(4), 523-545.

Stampler, L. (2011, April 4). Slutwalks sweep the nation. Retrieved from http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2011/04/20/slutwalk-united-states-city_n_851725.html
Students Active for Ending Rape. (2011). About us. Retrieved from http://www.safercampus.org/about-us

U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission. (n.d.). Sexual harassment.
Retrieved from http://www.eeoc.gov/laws/types/sexual_harassment.cfm
US Equal Employment Opportunity Commision. (n.d.). Title vii of the civil rights act
of 1964
. Retrieved from http://www.eeoc.gov/laws/statutes/titlevii.cfm

Wood, J. (2009). Gendered lives: Communication, gender, and culture. Boston, MA:
Wadsworth Cengage Learning

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“The nun who kissed Elvis”

Upon reading through the news, I came over a very interesting article from
foxnews.com. It was about an old famous actress named Dolores Hart. She was once envied by many girls in the 50’s because she got the opportunity to kiss the infamous Elvis Presley in “Loving You“. The reason for this beauty is
being brought back into the lime light is because she has appeared in a documentary that was nominated year, 50 years after her hit with Elvis. What’s
different about this actress these days you may ask? Well, these days the actress has a different wardrobe. At age 24, Hart became a Roman Catholic nun. Because this story is very unique and interesting, the documentary “God Is the Bigger Elvis” was created. So Hart has a lot of women, especially from the ’50s asking “Why in the world would you go from being an actress to a nun?”

When reading this article, I was personally surprised by Hart’s choice. She was a
successful actress, participating in 16 other movies. And the typical lifestyle
of a Hollywood actress isn’t the same as a nun…so where is the connection? It
is actually thanks to her movie “Where the Boys Are” that she found her lifelong calling. The movie was placed in Rome and there she met Pope John XXIII and decided where to take her life from there. Since she took her vows in 1970, she has been a dedicated Roman Catholic nun.

In our society, the label nun usually has people think of a couple different
things: Catholic, black and white outfits (habits), and strict. Personally, I
have never met a nun in my life; however, my father went to Catholic school and his teachers were nuns. Naturally, the only stories I have ever heard of nuns deals with my dad being drug around by his ear and being hit with rulers and wooden spoons. “They see us as simple, acquiescent people. We are not given credit for being women of decision and administrators of every kind of institution.” (Smith, 1994) Sr. Irene Fugazy talks about the stereotypes she and her sisters face on a regular basis thanks to media and the general public. “One sore spot was the notion that all nuns wear habits.”(Smith, 1994). According to Religious Orders, nuns’ outfits can range from formal wear of blazers to jeans or denim skirts. In the campaign in this article, the sisters were working on breaking the stereotypes by even going as far to emphasize in advertisements about the work they do, such as “educators, social workers, health care professionals or administrators” (Smith, 1994). The idea of all this generalizing is known as “stereotyping”. A stereotype is taking an idea, like nuns, and placing them all into one category and generalizing them. An example of this is back where my dad is from. There was one school when he was growing up and it was a Catholic school with solely nuns as the faculty and staff. The nuns my dad dealt with constantly had to punish him because he was always doing something wrong. Because of this, my dad has a natural resentment towards nuns and tells negative stories about them. Because my siblings and I only hear negative things about nuns from him, and don’t have a personal interaction with them, we also generalize all nuns and stereotype them by saying they’re mean and strict.

Although media has made movies such as Sister Act, “when a member of the
clergy appears on screen, it’s usually in the form of a stereotype.” (Martin, 1994). However, today, as previously stated, nuns aren’t the media’s ideal sisters in habits and aren’t phased by media. In fact, in Rome in 2008, there was an online beauty pageant for nuns. Reverend Antonio Rungi wanted to “fight the stereotype that nuns are all old and dour….External beauty is gift from God, and we mustn’t hide it.” (Canadian Press, 2008) Although there was criticism from other Catholic organizations, it is actions like these
that need to be put into place to help nuns fight stereotypes.

 

Resources:

www.foxnews.com

Google Images

www.imbd.com

Italian priest to organize `beauty contest’ for nuns: `Miss Sister 2008′. (n.d). Canadian Press, The,

Martin, J. (1994). Penguins, regular guys, idiots and whoopi goldberg.   Amberica, 170,

Smith,C. (1994). Sisters fight old stereotypes, cultivate spanking new image. National Catholic Reporter, 30(16), 24.

 

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All Girls Are Weak

Meet Anna Watson. She is a junior at the University of George, an exercise and sports medicine major, and an avid church member. One could say Anna is strong; she is able to bench press 155 lbs., squat 255 lbs., bicep curls with 35 lbs., and dead lift 230 lbs. Many look at this picture and automatically think: steroids, because a girl couldn’t possibly be that strong; well, they’re wrong. Anna is completely natural, in fact, a prospective company wanted her to put on an additional 50 pounds with the assistant of a supplement and she refused to.

Through the different components of communication we notice certain practices and habits. One solid practice our entire society has is to generalize and stereotype. It’s hard, I will admit that; since beginning my time in the communication program, and these nasty habits being brought to my attention, I’ve really tried to stop myself. How does this relate to you? Think about everyday conversations with friends at school. A prime example is conversation at d-hall; watch what you say next time. It’s almost a guarantee that from people watching that you will generalize or stereotype one person. I’m not saying this is on purpose at all; I feel horrible when looking back, however, generalizing has become almost second nature in our society. Anna faces this problem every game day when displaying her “masculine” body. People will automatically assume that because she doesn’t look like a “natural” or “regular” cheerleader that she is on stevedores or possibly a different gender. This generalizing or assuming could also be seen as “symbolic interactionism”.

Symbolic Interactionism is “individuals learn to participate competently in their society and to share its values through communication with others.” (Wood, 2003) Through symbolic interactionism, girls are usually taught through their peers and family members the usual practices of a young lady. (i.e. be “lady like”, play with dolls, and wear pink) “Symbolic interactionism makes it clear that the process of defining a personal self is inevitably a social process that reflects the views of others we have incorporated into our own perspectives.” (Wood, 53) The beautiful thing about Anna though is that she doesn’t care! She admits that it’s not exactly easy but she’s happy doing exactly what she’s doing. ‘”It was hard for a girl, because psychologically, you’re like, ‘I don’t want to gain any weight, whether it’s muscle or not,’ Waston said. “And a lot of girls and even a lot of people [in] in society look down on girls with a lot of muscle…”‘ (Glaser, 2012) Anna is fighting against stereotypes daily, and the amazing thing is that she’s in love with her body, even if it is considered extremely “masculine”.

Anna is a successful athlete. She has been involved in two different sports her entire life: gymnastics and cheerleading. I find this amazing that she continues to be apart of the University of Georgia cheerleading squad even though she may be criticized for her physique. She is not only a physically strong woman, however, she is also a very strong woman emotionally wise. Anna is proof that yes symbolic interactionism is everywhere, however, not everyone is extremely influenced by it. Anna Watson is a beautiful woman, on the inside and out.

Resources:

Glaser, L. (2012, January 26). Cheerleader not defined by physique. redandblack.com. Retrieved from http://redandblack.com/2012/01/26/cheerleader-not-defined-by-physique/

Wood, J. (2003).  Communication, gender, and culture. Chapel Hill, NC: Thomson Wadsworth

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Wait You’re From Where?

My name is Hillary Bourke and when I tell people where I’m from and the school I go to, people usually laugh with a remark like “Is that a real place?”, “That’s actually the real name?”, “I thought that was a TV show!” or “I thought that was a game!” following. I am from Orange County located in central Virginia. I am currently a junior at Longwood University in Farmville, VA. I have decided to be a Communication Studies major and want to enter the Public Relations field upon graduating in May of 2013.

I have had a couple different experiences in the Communication field. My first one would be on the Longwood Equestrian team. I was an active member for two years and I constantly recruited and advertised for the team through word-of-mouth. (One of the most popular ways of advertising.) I also was the treasurer for the team. With this position, I was in charge of scheduling fundraising ideas. I would go to Farmville area businesses and set up fundraising nights; after doing this, I would advertise on campus and try and get as many people to come as possible. Through this organizational planning I raised a lot of money for my team. I also was the Continuing Membership Chair for the Delta Nu chapter of Sigma Kappa for 2011. This means that I was in charge of organizing open houses throughout the two semesters of having my position. I had to develop new and innovative themes and ideas to recruit prospective members for my chapter. I also had to help organize unique advertisement throughout campus and help get the word out about our open houses. With these expertise and constantly learning about Communication Studies through my classes, I have been learning and experiencing a lot in my field within my three years at Longwood University.

My personal experience with gender roles is when I was little. I was raised very closely with all my cousins. One cousin in particular, Megan, and I are six months a part, putting us in the same grade. We were constantly being compared to. I was the prissy cousin while Megan was the “tom boy”. Where I wore pink dresses and pearls, she wore t-shirts and jeans. I was the “ideal” little girl while she was the “opposite”. These society developed ideas are drilled into our heads at a young age. I thought it was weird that Megan liked to play in dirt and not want to play Barbies. She had a lot of friends that were boys and all my friends were girls. However, a couple years down the road my ideas about Megan’s style and personality changed. I suddenly wanted to throw away all my dresses and ride in the Go-Kart with her. I wanted to become more masculine. My ideas about my style and activities changed a lot through my lifetime, however, Megan only recently changed. Since beginning college, she has started developing more feminine traits. She now does more “girly” things such as styles her hair, wears a little make-up, and wears dresses. College has changed Megan; some of our family says she has “matured” and “become a woman”. I don’t believe that just because she has become matured just because she has become more “girly”. Megan is still Megan; she still has “masculine” traits (according to the “Bem Sex Role Inventory) such as being independent, dominant, and extremely competitive; however, she just wants to be a normal college student.

I am thoroughly enjoying my communication experiences in my college career. Through the riding team, Sigma Kappa, and my classes I have constantly been learning new and exciting ways to communicate with my audiences.

 

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Let’s Go Lancers!

What are you looking for in a school? Would it be having a meaningful relationship with your professor? How about having 182 different clubs and organizations to become apart of to not only make an impact on you, but on your school and Farmville, VA? Becoming a part of the Longwood University community is a life changing event. With a campus that has a close knit atmosphere, a student would have to try and feel lost. Longwood helped me discover who I am and what I can accomplish; and I have about 5,000 others that will agree with me. Now Longwood is not only great because of its various organizations on campus; it is also known for it’s competitive academics, competing with all surrounding schools. So why go to Longwood University to further your education? The better question is why not.

Academically wise, Longwood University has all the popular majors available for its students. Twenty-one percent of the student body are liberal studies major, making it the most popular major on campus. (“Longwood university”, 2012) Longwood is currently ranked 29th in the Regional University South Rankings. (http://colleges.usnews.rankingsandreviews.com/best-colleges/rankings/regional-universities-south) With an 18:1 student to faculty ratio, a great education is guaranteed because of the automatic closer relationship with your professors. This is great because class discussions are easier to accomplish and this smaller class sizes allows for teachers to not just teach by having lectures; they are able to do many different teaching techniques. “Students perform better on essay-work and mid-semester examination in smaller classes.” (Johnson, 2010) With great academic standings and an amazing Longwood student culture, this university is a unique and amazing institution.

Culture: what does it mean? When looking at it from an organizational perspective it is “webs of significance; systems of shared meaning.” (Griffin, 2009) When looking at Longwood, we can look at it like a giant web. One person is connected to an organization, then another person in that organization is connected to a different organization; it goes on and on and some people are in the same organizations, causing the image to be a web, not a continuing straight line. So why does this interest you, the perspective student? Because think about all the different organizations you can join, along with all the people you can meet through the many organizations Longwood has to offer. Also in today’s increasingly competitive job market, “employers are increasingly expecting students to display capacities beyond those of simply achieving a degree.” (Stevenson, 2011) So, through the many subcultures that the university has to offer, they (at the end of the day) want to help you become the most competitive upon leaving. Through the many different clubs and organizations, Longwood wants the best for its students, and constantly encourages us to become more involved through campus wide advertising and club/organization fairs.

Someone could easily look at Longwood as a big strong oak tree. The trunk of the tree is Longwood University, standing tall and proud. The roots of the tree are the different clubs and organizations. The roots help make the tree stand strong. The tree is able to stand if one or two roots die, however, if they all were to suddenly shrivel up, then the tree would die. Longwood University strives off of student spirit and the students are apart of all the different organizations. Without the organizations, Longwood wouldn’t have as much pride and wouldn’t stand as tall. This is a metaphor. A metaphor is a non related word that is adopted to refer to a subject or thing (Griffin, 2009). A metaphor helps people make a connection, and in this case, make something that may be foggy brought to life (i.e. Longwood’s culture).

Stories are another anecdote that helps outsiders gain an understanding of a subject. Through stories of different clubs on campus, prospective students can familiarize themselves with these organizations to help them understand what they are about. One type of story available is a “personal story”; this is a story told by a student about another in a positive light. (Griffin, 2009) An example is ‘Laura became involved in a Greek organization on campus. She was an active member for two years until she graduated. Upon her first job interview, her hiring manager was in the same organization she was from a different school. Through this networking, and her hard work, Laura received a job offer at the end of the interview’. This story illustrates how becoming involved on campus, and having good grades can really help you receive a job post college.

Ritual is seen everywhere. Ritual can “be repetitive behavior, an established form of a ceremony or action. It usually marks rites of passage/life transition,” (Griffin, 2009). Rituals are all around Longwood University that are fun and unique. One example of ritual would be color wars. This is held the Friday of the famous “Oktoberfest” and is an unifying, campus wide event. If you graduate on an odd numbered year then you are on team green, and if you are graduating on an even numbered year then you are on the red team. Participants gather with their team in a white t-shirt. When it is announced GO!, the teams take cups of their colored paint and throw it towards the opposing team. This ritual happens every year, and along with this tradition, it brings together the student body. Students who don’t know each other, and are of different ages are brought together and bond; and it is because of this, that we need to make sure that we not only preserve this tradition, but the weekend of Oktoberfest and Spring Weekend as well.

The weekends of Oktoberfest and Spring Weekend are not only an exciting time for the students, however, it is also a fun time for perspective students and the Farmville community. These two weekends are always a lot of fun not only because of the entertainment, but because of the fun atmosphere and watching the cultures throughout the campus come together as well as the Farmville community. These weekends demonstrate the different subcultures (or organizations) come together to raise money for their philanthropies, clubs, and help support their fellow classmates. Perspective students are welcome to come down this day to be shown around campus, then witness one of the funnest weekends Longwood University has to offer. These rituals need to stay constant because of the energy they bring to campus.

When visiting our campus, you may notice many different signs on students’ shirts and on posters. An example of this would be a relay for life ribbon poster. Analyzing this sign through semiology (“the study of how a sign has developed a meaning society has dubbed it” (Griffin, 2009)), a viewer of this sign would notice the visuals of the sign: the colors, RELAY FOR LIFE, cancer, fight, ect. These physical attributes could also be known as the “signifier”. After looking at the sign, you will think of the actual event and how hundreds of people walk through the night to help raise money to fight cancer. This associated meaning is known as the “signified”. (Griffin, 2009) Now why does this effect you, the perspective student? Because if you were to come to Longwood University’s Relay for Life night, you would realize how amazing and touching this event on campus really is. “Longwood students are passionate about ‘doing their part’ toward finding a cure,” (Longwood University’s Relay, 2010). On this night, clubs and organizations throughout the campus come together, raise money for Relay, and walk all throughout the night together. The campus and community comes together and helps to raise awareness and do as much as they can to help with Relay for Life. This is another example of how this university may be small, but we are amazing and unique.

Longwood University is a small school located in Farmville, VA. Because many people don’t even know Farmville is a real town, not many know a lot about Longwood; these people are missing out. Longwood University may be small, however, it makes up for it with all the unique and fun activities constantly going on throughout campus. Within this culture, there are many subcultures to become a part of. Becoming involved in these rituals and stories are life changing. It’s important to understand these because they play a big part in not only your future organization(s), however, they are a part of every culture of organizations. Along with this, being aware of sings and symbols around campus is vital to know what is going on. There are so many things going on on campus all the time, knowing what symbols mean what in Longwood’s culture is helpful so you don’t have to read every word on every flyer. This active school is a gem. It’s an amazing institution that has so much to offer. If considering Longwood, think about visiting Oktoberfest or Spring Weekend to witness the subcultures, rituals, and much more; you’ll understand why so many have fallen in love.

Resources:

Griffin, E. (2009). A first look at communication theory. New York, NY: McGraw-Hill.

Johnson, I. Y. (2010). Class Size and Student Performance at a Public Research University: A Cross-Classified Model. Research In Higher Education, 51(8), 701-723.

Longwood university. (2012). Retrieved from http://collegesearch.collegeboard.com/search/CollegeDetail.jsp?match=true&collegeId=1059&searchType=college&type=qfs&word=Longwood University

Longwood universit’ys relay for life tops $50,000 in donations. (2010). 2010 News Release. Retrieved from

Regional university south ranking. (2012). Retrieved from http://colleges.usnews.rankingsandreviews.com/best-colleges/rankings/regional-universities-south/page 4

Stevenson, J., & Clegg, S. (2011). Possible Selves: Students Orientating Themselves towards the Future through Extracurricular Activity. British Educational Research Journal, 37(2), 231-246.

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